neoacidcreep

If my father is my model of God and God is Everything (Everything with a capital e), then what is my father?  Subsequently, what am I if I contain only half of my father's genetic material and, presumably, only one-third of his personality (rough estimate, basing one-third on him, one-third on my mother, and one-third on unique experience that I, and I alone, have experienced: although it might be more accurate to assume he is a one-fifth of my personality if I take into account my two sisters and mother, but this train of thought would arguably lead me to calculating the amount of time I have spent with everyone I have ever met and then assigning each a ratio to total time alive, I would also have to factor in depth of time spent together because, I assume, that time shared with my mother and father at my early development was more profound then, say, time spent at a bar with some random guy, arguable on both fronts so for the sake of comprehension he will total one-third of my personality.) where does that leave me in the Grand Scheme? 

If viewed from another angle; what does this say about my father?  If I worship a jealous, wrathful, all-powerful God, what then is my father but some amalgam of these same tendencies?  Whereby, extension, fifty-percent of my being would be composed of wrath, jealousy, and omnipotence, at least at a genetic level, and one-third of personality would be composed of the same elements; besides wrath and jealousy, which all humans are capable of, I am most definitely not omnipotent (I am strictly speaking in terms of being able to create without expounding an equivalent amount of energy.).  Where then does my conception of God arise?

I am not prone to believing that I culled all my information on God from a single book, i.e. The Bible (I am, at the very least, open-minded enough to read certain parts of The Bible literally and other parts as metaphor trying to explain complex ideas to "simplistic people", the story of Creation for example, which presented a large gap in logic for me when God enters the Garden and asks Adam why he is hiding, an all-knowing God would already have the answer so why would He ask?).  I had to have created certain aspects of God independent of my father and independent of the Church, but where could these ideas have come from?

How am I capable of creating a "new" and personal view about God?  Where does the sensory data come from that would shape my opinion (if you are of the empiricist mind-set)?  Where do the differences in my opinion and the Church's opinion arise?  I have had no first hand dealings with God but have an entire set of differing beliefs then what I have been fed and taught by my parents and upbringing, viz. the Catholic religion.  Why do I believe that God is simply the Universe and the "unexplainable" attraction of certain atoms to other specific atoms?  Or to simplify that statement; why do I believe that the Universe has developed a consciousness and sometimes people (prophets or scientist) pierce the veil of appearances and can gain knowledge, whether of a "spiritual nature" or of "physical knowledge"? 

What about me makes me believe, even, that there is no difference between "spiritual" and "physical" knowledge?  My father most certainly does not hold this same opinion, and yet he is my model for God, what then does that mean of God?  Is God self-doubting?  My father is not self-doubting, much the opposite.  I have now driven myself to a paradox; I believe in a God that is modeled off of my father, the God I believe in differs from my father on key components, the God my father believes in differs from my God on key components, my father would say that my God doesn't exist, which would imply my father doesn't exist, which would imply God doesn't exist (by extension); what then is the answer?  Where have I developed my belief in God if not from first-hand experience, albeit unwittingly so?